amanda

the tune will come to you at last

Tue, 16 Aug 2005 03:37:58 GMT

work sucked today...im so sick of 4-year-olds, you have no idea..

its friends only from now on..comment if you want to be added

now open

Thu, 11 Aug 2005 03:24:18 GMT

so i finally set up the whole photo bucket thing...but i have no clue how to use it. im that good

today was funny...i went to get the rest of kyle gift, its still shitty, but i like it.. so ha!

i parked my car and we got out...then i saw a pigeon, and i decided to watch him..he was walking around in a circle, but walking backwards...and then all of a suddden it just shit. right there. then it flew away...thats the second time ive seen that happen. pigeons shit funny. i only whish i had no choice but to shit like that.

way too long entry #2

Tue, 09 Aug 2005 15:20:12 GMT

D o u g i e D 09: haha , kyle remember that time you got my shoe when it got stuck in the mud, haha amanda remember when one of you boyfriends thought you cheated on him with me, when all you did was play 007, which your horrible at, with me
PANDA114: hahaha! yessss!
D o u g i e D 09: i should start my speech now, i would have to think of some good stuff
PANDA114: start crankin it out now
D o u g i e D 09: whatelse would i write
D o u g i e D 09: that me and you probably talk to each other once every 3 months and when we do, we talk for hours
PANDA114: yea....and about our walks to and from school
D o u g i e D 09: and bus buddies
PANDA114: and that one football scrimage we went to where we watched that kid piss in teh woods
D o u g i e D 09: hahah yes!
D o u g i e D 09: and sometimes we would take the long way around and through minds falls to our houses
PANDA114: yea, thinking that it might be a shorter walk
D o u g i e D 09: hahah and the time you almost had an ashma attack when you lite the book of matches
PANDA114: hahaha!
PANDA114: or the time i almost got blown over by the wind
D o u g i e D 09: hahaha
D o u g i e D 09: or the time you called me a litter bug, all the way from riverside to your house
PANDA114: hahaha! you got so pissed at me
D o u g i e D 09: i was ready to hit you, you got so annoying
PANDA114: hahaha, i couldnt stop laughing
D o u g i e D 09: yea i could tell
PANDA114: and the days whre i would notice you liek 10 minutes behind me, and i would stand there and wait for you
PANDA114: or it would be like 90 degrees out, and i would make fun of you cuz you were wearing 3 t-shirts
D o u g i e D 09: hahah yea, i only wear 2 shirts now
PANDA114: wow doug, im impressed

hmmm...it was a good conversation. this morning my mom told me i dress like a cartoon and that she thinks i only do it to make her mad. yep, that certainly is it, props to mommy for figuring that out.

come on, this is your chance

Tue, 09 Aug 2005 01:50:38 GMT

i completely thought that pool party was on wednesday...i just realized an hour ago that it was today..im awesome! i dont really know what to say. i got bored and did a survey

Basics
full name: amanda elizabeth clark
nicknames: manda, makenzie,darling
location: nashua hn
birth place: nashua nh
nationality: polish, latvian, italian, english, irish and scottish
sex: female
age: 17
status: taken
zodiac sign: virgo…but I disagree, im more of a leo
height: 5’ ½ in
eyes: hazel
hair: short and brown
Family
what are your parents names? frank and albertina (trina)
Where were they born? my mom in nashua, and my dad in mass. somewhere
how many brothers do u have? 3
what are their names? Ben, Jonny and Chris
how old are they? Ben (13) Jonny (27) Chris (31)
how many sisters do u have? 2
what are their names? Emily and Jenny
how old are they? Emily (14) Jenny (29)
how many pets do u have? 9
what is their names? Sparky(dog), Spud, Dolly, Mo, Neo, Brock, Molson, Erika, Shelby, and Gordon (fishies)
Favorites
x. memory – mucho memories
x. quote – I really don’t know
x. saying – same as above
x. colors – red black and green
x. smell – new car smell
x. school subject – art 4
x. place – the swing set at Greeley park
x. sport to watch - gymnastics
x. sport team – shit
x. drink – i like water
x. pop – root beer
x. gum – no gum
x. meal – haddock with mashed potatoes and veggies
x. restaurant – chen yang lee
x. fast food place – ick..i prefer to wait
x. store – i don’t know
x. brand of clothing – as long as it fits it’s good
x. brand of shoes – vans are comfy
x. actor – Adam Sandler
x. actress – Julia Roberts
x. music – mmmeh, i guess rock, but i like lots of stuff
x. song – picking one song is like picking one thing to eat for the rest of your life..nothing else, just that one food
x. modern rock band - i don’t know
x. rapper - nope
x. hip hop artist - no
x. r&b artist - eeh
x. pop artist – i like Gwen Stefani
x. b-day present – uph, which one? the bracelet, the fish tank and fish, blueman tickets…
x. time of day – mornings
x. day of the week – they’re all the same
x. month - january
x. season - fall
Name 5 of You Favorite Movies
x. Peter Pan
x. Something About Mary
x. SuperStar
x. City of Angels
x. The Italian Job
Name 5 of You Favorite Shows
x. The Backyardigans !(hahahahaha)
x. Fire Me Please
x. Boy Meets World
x. Girlmore Girls
x. Full House
This or That
x. hockey/baseball = hockey
x. flip flops/sandals = flip flops
x. heels/sneakers = sneakers
x. coke/Pepsi = coke
x. coffee/tea = tea
x. cake/bannock = what the hell is bannock?
x. moose/goose = moose
x. one/two pillows = one
x. online/phone = phone
x. city/town = city
x. train/plane = plane
x. day/night = night
x. sunset/sunrise = sunrise
x. incense/candles = candles
x. love/lust = love
x. sunshine/rain = i like both
x. summer/winter = winter
x. skydiving/bungee jumping = i’ve never done either, but if i had the chance, i would sky dive
x. silver/gold = silver
x. hugs/kisses = it depends on how im feeling at the moment
x. flowers/candy = candy
x. bath/shower = shower
x. millionaire/true love = true love
...about guys...
x. good/bad boy = i can handle bad boys…hahaha
x. boxers/briefs = boxers
x. tall/short = it’d be hard to find a guy shorter than me
x. long/short hair = longer…but not wicked long
x. 6pack/muscular arms = a 6 pack is exciting
x. hat/no hat = both are good
x. piercing/tattoos = piercings are ok, tattoos are nice, but not too many
x. accent/not = not
x. tan/fair = fair
x. stubble/neat shaved = stubble
x. hottie/cutie = wither way
x. boring/exciting = exciting
...about myself...
x. granny panties/thongs – i don’t like granny panties, and i don’t like thongs
x. fancy/sports bra = um…a bra
x. painted nails/not = not
x. cute n mysterious/wild n sexy = comfortable
x. dressy/casual = casual..but its fun to get dressy sometimes
x. dark/light hair = dark
x. long/short hair = short
x. curly/straight hair = straight
x. dark/light eyes = in between
x. hat/not = no hat…i look like a boy with a hat
x. good/bad girl = a girl
x. hair up/down = down
x. tall/short = short
x. tan/fair = fair
x. freckles/not = very few
x. accent/not = none
x. shy/outgoing = depends on how I feel
Random Stuff
last...
x. movie you rented = i think Texas Chainsaw Massacre
x. movie you seen in theatre = Devil’s Rejects
x. song you listened to = the grudge tool
x. song that was stuck in your head = Up Down Turn It Around, playschool warm up music
x. TV show you've watched = family matters
x. person u called = kyle
x. person u talked to = emily
x. person u hugged = kyle
x. person u instant messaged = ally
x. person u kissed = kyle
x. person u yelled at = ben
x. person u laughed with = ben
x. time u showered = 8 this morning
x. time u saw ur worst enemy = yesterday morning
x. time u cried = last night
x. time u swam in a pool = a while ago
do...
x. you wish you could live somewhere else = i kinda like nashua
x. you believe in online dating = no
x. others find you attractive = no
x. you like hickies = no
x. you think hickies are too nish = what the hell is nish?
x. you like cleaning = I have to be in the right move
x. you like roller coasters = yes
x. you write in cursive or print = a mixture
x. you want to live to be 100 = if im stuck in a bed pissing into a little bag, no
x. you wish on stars = yes
x. you trust others easily = well yes, but it really depends on the person
x. you believe in love at first sight = its not love at first sight, its attraction at first sight
x. believe in god = not really
x. believe in angels = not really
x. you like to sing in the shower = sometimes
x. you like to sing on the toilet = no
x. you sleep with stuffed animals = yep, stitch and this dog thing
x. you prefer movies that are funny, sad or scary = funny
x. you know the words to the national anthem = im pretty sure i do
x. you think there's a pot of gold at the end of every rainbow = of course
x. you have anyone blocked on ur msn = i don’t have msn
x. you think you're a sex addict = yes…hahahaha
x. you think exes can still be friends = sure
x. you keep a diary = lj basically counts, so yes
x. you like to cook = no
x. you talk in your sleep = i don’t think i do
x. you bite your fingernails = no
x. you resemble any celebrities = no
have you...
x. ever made a prank call = sort of
x. ever called a 1-900 # = no
x. ever met a celebrity = yes, rajh bavisar….he’s hot
x. ever cried over a boy = yes
x. ever lied to someone = yes
x. ever been in a fist fight = yes, hed..in the 6th grade
x. ever been arrested = no
x. ever ran away = i almost did when i was little
x. ever been in love = yes
x. ever cried when someone died = i have
x. ever lied to get yourself out of trouble = mmmmmyes
x. ever cry because of someone's mean words = no…i cry at people cuz i get angry
x. ever used someone = no
x. ever been used by someone = yes
x. ever driven a nished out vehicle = what the fuck is nish?
x. ever had braces = yes, 4 years
x. ever been in a beauty pagaent = no
x. ever broke a bone = nope
x. ever been in a car accident = yes, and they just left…i was mad. i cried
what...
x. does your name mean = loving, easy to love
x. makes u happy = the simple things
x. is your dream car = if it works its my dream car
x. shampoo do you use = Pantene Pro-V
x. body spray do you use = i dont
x. shoes do you wear = black flip flops that are falling apart
x. color lipstick do u wear = i dont
x. are you scared of = spiders
x. music u dislike most = country
x. age did u find out santa wasn't real = i don’t remember
x. was your fav toy as a child = my little ponies
x. color is your house = white
x. color is your room = paneling that looks like the inside of trees…
x. color is your sheets = brown blue red and green
x. color is you carpet = shades of brown
x. decade would u like to live in = 80s
number...
x. of homes you've lived in = 1
x. of times you've been kicked out = 0
x. of schools you've attended = 5
x. of times I have been in love = once
x. of kids I want to have = 2 or 3…7, i don’t know
x. of people I consider my enemies = i don’t know, i can say how many people i dislike
x. of times my name has appeared in the newspaper = quite a few times actually
x. of things in my past that I regret = mmm, too many
x. of percings or tattoos = 4
x. of trophies u have received = mucho
THREE THINGS THAT SCARE ME:
01 | being alone
02 | the dark
03 | spiders
THREE PEOPLE WHO MAKE ME LAUGH:
01 | kyle
02 | sara l
03 | jon
THREE THINGS I LOVE:
01 | birds
02 | bees
03 | apples in the trees
THREE THINGS I DISLIKE:
01 | sticky stuff
02 | snobbys
03 | long sureys
THREE OF MY BAD HABITS:
01 | im bad at remembering things
02 | i have a messy room
03 | trying to help when im not good at it
THREE THINGS I DON'T UNDERSTAND:
01 | flying
02 | masturbating
03 | knee boarding
THREE THINGS ON MY DESK BESIDE THE COMPUTER THINGYS:
01 | my jeans
02 | a pen
03 | picture of elvis
THREE THINGS I'M DOING RIGHT NOW:
01 | filling this out
02 | farting
03 | listening to the radio
THREE THINGS I CAN DO:
01 | walk on my hands
02 | play with clay
03 | sing…really good too..especially that song intermission
THREE WAYS TO DESCRIBE MY PERSONALITY:
01 | happy
02 | “chill” words from russ
03 | energetic
THREE THINGS I CAN'T DO:
01 | write a play
02 | drive big chevy trucks
03 | cook
THREE THINGS I SAY THE MOST:
01 | shut up
02 | love
03 | yes
THREE SHOWS YOU WATCHED WHEN YOU WERE A KID:
01 | eurikas castle
02 | mr.rodgers
03 | daivid the gnome

uh oh, ms.lemmons must be doing crack again kids...

Thu, 04 Aug 2005 21:01:37 GMT

i severely suck. alright, for my birthday kyle is going to take me to see blueman group on august 12. so i figured since i was getting my gift early i should have one for him early, and i really suck at finding gifts. however, i usually do ok. so im going to blueman, amazing gift. i got kyle a blender. yea, you read it right, i bought him a FUCKING BLENDER. how bad is that? really bad. i already know how bad it is. really super fucking bad. last resort fucking bad. therefore, i suck. severly suck.

today i was supposed to meet hilly at leda lanes to go bowling at 4. it's 5 right now. kinda early to be back from bowling isn't it? oh yea! that's because i never went fucking bowling! i left the house at 3:30 so i would have time to get money and gas. i go to the bank and get money, and i realize that im wearing sandals, i don't have socks. so i quickly go over to sears cuz i figured i could get a cheap pair of socks there. get to sears and buy the cheapest pair of socks i can find. i run into the parking lot, an i cant remember where i parked my car. so there i am, walking around like a fool with my cheap betty boop striped socks and have no idea where my car is. i find and and get to the bowlign ally early. 5 minutes early. stinky kate was there, i said hi to her and then sat down waiting for hilly. yea, i sat there until 4:45. i didnt see hilly, she stood me up. fuck!

the necessary evil

Wed, 03 Aug 2005 03:38:52 GMT

"amanda, you shouldn't write so much in your livejournal. because by the time i see you it's all old news."

i'll work on this, lets see....what did i do today?

-got some breathing done today
-did a little sleeping
-walked a bit
-took a shit

i think that about sums it up, my life

oh! last night with the heat lightning, amazing. i wish there was heat lightning every night. me and my daddy stood in the driveway and watched it until it started to rain. that probably wasn't the smartest thing to be doing, but it was so cooool.

there's this kid named steve. he started to im me the other day telling me he knows my friend kendal, and goes to south. and he finds out that i know ali, and that i was at her party, and apparently he was there too, but i cannot remember what he looks like for the life of me. i'm not sure if this is a bad thing to say, but i can't even remember if he was one of the special kids or not. if he was, i think i know who he is, but it's not like i can just go, "hey, were you one of the mentally disabled kids?"..that would be really mean. whatever, we dont know eachother, but he sure likes talking to me.

fire! fire! fire! yeaaa!

Sat, 30 Jul 2005 01:14:01 GMT

waa, it's been a good week. i've seen so many people at randomn places...john, carolina, chuck, ian, ryan, cassie, and ashley...and kyle here and there. him and i went to see charlie and the chocolate factory on wednesday, and then the devil's rejects on thursday. i loved charlie and the chocolate factory! the umpa lumpas were friggin hilarious. and devil's rejects was funny, but in a fucked up way. it was so gruesome it was funny. lots of boobs too.

i went with my dad to some junk yard today to get a whole new wheel. mine was fucked up, i hit one too many curbs, and that's why i needed to put more air in it every 3 days. so i got that done, $62.

and then daddy decided to take me to get my birthday present. he got me a laptop (!!)...it was the cheapest one we could find, heh, the printer and a backpack came with it. of course, we had to go to look at five different stores before he got me one, but we got it at sam's, i never thought i would get a laptop there.

i love my daddy. last night when i got home, he was in the basement. and according to the clock in the basement, it was 11:02. daddy looks at me and says, "your mother went to the movies w/ ben. she told me that if you were even a minute late, i was to ground you. but i'll tell her you were a few minutes early." waaa, i was happy. as weird and old fashioned and as awkward as he can be at times, he's a good man.

mmmmah! and i felt like shit today, i almost started to cry. i have this friend, hillary(hilly)...i barely ever see her, and she's a year behind me. and i always fuck up cuz i always say we'll hang out and i just never get around to making plans with her. so had plans to go bowling today, i was supposed to pick her up at 4. me and my dad are in citcuit city, and my phone rings. it's 4:35, and it was hilly. "hey manda, are we still bowling today, or what?" i completely forgot today was friday, i thought it was thursday. and i was with my dad in the store, and when he's shopping for something you can't talk to him because he doesn't hear it, he'd too god damn focused on what the best deal is. and she sounded so sad and let down, again, and i thought i was going to cry. i dont fuck things up with people often, but it seems like every time i do, it's with her. so we decided on next thursday, and i hope to god i remember this time

you just cannot leave

Tue, 26 Jul 2005 00:21:20 GMT

the past week has been pretty good. i went to my cabin with my family on tuesday, which wasn't half as bad as i thought it would be. i thought it would be bad with me and my mom, but it was all good...until friday, that was when i left to go camping with kyle/craig and others. she wasn't very happy about this, but oh well. she's the one who messed up.

camping was very fun too. friday night i never went to bed until 5:00, so it was saturday morning. me and kyle thought it was funny, cuz we could hear the morning birds chirping, and we were just about to go to sleep. they we went to the flume saturday, pretty, we ate a real meal. and then watched steven get completely trashed and shit/throwup all over the place. i felt bad for the kid. he threw up, and the first one was friggin huge, ziti was all over the puke spot...then we gave him gatorade, and he threw all that up..then he threw up all the water we gave him. it wasnt that great.
me and kyle didnt stay up so late saturday, it was freeezing outside. so i didnt sleep very well that night either, cuz kyle kept stealing the blankets, so i had NONE...however i did get some sleep.

there was a bunch of funny shit, but there was one super funny moment that makes me laugh....sunday morning we needed to get out of the campground fast, and we got up late. me and kyle were basically the last 2 to wake up, and i get changed, and was trying to get kyle out of bed...so i told him that if he woke up i would dress him. he agreed, of course, i had to stand him up first. but i got him up, properly dressed him. i turn around, and he's laying down again going, "just five more minutes"....except he said it in a whiney 5-year-old kind of voice, and with his eyes half shut. i ended up giving in, and i ended up laying down too.

i have this thing about people that i dont really know touching me. i dont freak out and like go insane, i let it happen, it's just one of those things that makes me want to beat the person, but i dont. today while i was working i had this little boy named alex in my group. and he was adorable and so funny. and during snack time he comes over to me and starts holding my hand. now i've already spent like 2 1/2 hours with the kid, and he was nice..but i wanted to rip my hand out of his. and he's talking and talking, and holding on oh so tightly to my hand, but he's a innocent little kid. i couldn't do anything about it. drew blaska used to annoy me like that sophomore year, and that steve kid did it this weekend. i probably would have like to slap them too, except they were both like strangers to me when it happened. and id feel bad hurting someone i barely know.

i've written too much. id be surprised if someone read this.

hey! i wanna go see charlie and the chocolate factory, who wants to go with me?

you queef

Tue, 19 Jul 2005 03:11:24 GMT

damnit...another one of my fish died, that's two in the last two months. i was doing good at this taking care of fish thing...for a little while, now i just suck. god, flush me down the toilet!

my mother. a fucking manipulative shit sucking bitch. thats all i have to say.

you got a lot to learn...kid

Mon, 18 Jul 2005 12:18:15 GMT

mmmmwork this morning. i don't mind it there, it's just getting there that's the hard part. oh well

i need to go to the bank today and talk to them with my daddy, yay!

i need to shave my legs.

um, i kinda wanted to go to the pool party that mrs.p was having for the ahs...but if it's all the people that are going then i want nothing to do wiith it...but i never called her, and i lost her #..so if anyone remembers it, or still has the e-mail that she put it in could you let me know?

SLAP MY HAND!!

Sun, 17 Jul 2005 15:37:51 GMT

mmm ozzfest was awesome!

i had so much fun, deffinately worthit...arch enemy, black label...ozzy's ass(hahaha)...
iron maiden, rob zombie... i like him. many others as well, but i guess these are the only ones i can think of off the top of my head that i really really enjoyed....

Wed, 13 Jul 2005 23:10:59 GMT

oh yea, and this probably wasn't smart to do...but i dyed my sister's hair purple today. mommy wasn't home when we did it. and i guess you can she she wasn't too pleased?

and then i whipped out my secret weapon......

Wed, 13 Jul 2005 23:08:28 GMT

i had a fun day yesterday. and i did everything that my mom was complaining about. i let her know how's house i was at and what we planned on doing. and she seemed alright...until i walked in the house 45 mins after curfew.

i called and told her we were going to jon's to watch a movie, speed, and i wasnt sure if i was going to be home on time, but while we were talking she kept saying that there was no way i was going to be late because it wasnt a long movie. that was around 8:30, i think...
so we get to jons, talked for a little bit, decided we wanted pizza and ordered it....started the movie, pizza came..so naturally, we ate it. continued to watch the movie, then all done. talked a little bit about friday and such...then me and kyle brought sean home, and then kyle brought me home.

i hopped out of the truck, and rolled up my windows, go into the house at approximately 12:15...mom starts yelling...apparently i've been doing this all summer, and i completely disrespect her and i just walk around doing/saying whatever the hell i want. and it ended with her saying, "amanda do whatever you want, get into bed." so i went and brushed my teeth, then got into bed.

and i guess i'll do just what she said, whatever i want, and she better not give me shit for it again.

you just fucked my mouth

Mon, 11 Jul 2005 21:53:21 GMT

yesterday i went to kyles cabin for the day. we went out on the boat, and i decided to try knee boarding again. i got really excited cuz i had no problem getting up this time, and then i fell and the board nailed me in the face. i didnt try it again after that. i didnt bleed but i had a sore face and i have a bruise under my eye. kyle tried to make me throw up on the way home.

after we got back to nashua we met saul at haywards and then we found aundre and paul. wickid funny, they were both high, and it was paul's first time. he was so fucking hilarious. no alcohol. after leaving aundre and paul, then bringing saul back to his car, me and kyle went to a parking lot. we had 15 minutes of fooling around. no sex

OZZFEST THIS FRIDAY!

lets get pregnent!

Sun, 10 Jul 2005 03:16:39 GMT

i slept a lot today, and was in a very good mood when i woke up.

i finished reading lovely bones last night, it was an alright book. i only wish mr.harvey had a more grusome death.

i want to get trashed. i think sean's parents should go away again so there can be another party. i had fun there.

im getting used to my hair, maybe ill keep it. but im thinking of just shopping it all off

hidden in the closet

Fri, 08 Jul 2005 13:31:48 GMT

i just woke up

i have to mow the lawn and weed some of the garden this morning. i want to do something today...

i saw war of the worlds last night with emm and ben. ben got mad at me, just like every other time i go with him to the movies. him and i always go and see "horror" movies, and then i find them funny and cant stop laughing. so he gets mad because there are bodies being ripped in half and turned into red goop, and im laughing. he thinks it's inapropriate.

lastnight someone told me how changing in the back of kyles truck was a good idea. then i told them how it's only a good idea when kyles dad and sister aren't in the truck. yea, i was all ready to go, in my shitty dress but my pants in my purse and my shirt that was going in kyles pocket. my mom actually wasnt home, but i didnt change because i didnt know when she was going to get home. so kyle pulls up, nd then i see everybody in the truck, shit. i got changed so fast it was amazing. then i just took the dress with me and left it in the truck, then changed back into the dress when we left joe's house. we went to joe's after the wedding. nice wedding, annoying little creeps running around, but nice wedding.

Thu, 07 Jul 2005 21:51:30 GMT

FUCK! i hate stupid people who dont listen to you. i just got back a lil while ago from getting a hair cut.
it's an alright haircut, but it's not what i want. i dont like it.

i told her, i wanted it shorter. she just stops and looks at me..."but if i make it shorter it would look a little awkward, and you look adorable with hair like this." brush brush brush

i dont want to look adorable. i dont care if i look like a fucking zebra. i want to look how i want to look, why cant you just give it to me??? so there i was, and i had to pay fucking $30 on a hair cut that i dont even like. amazing!

oh my god, you are gonna be so popular!

Wed, 06 Jul 2005 21:32:55 GMT

i have to finish cleaning my room. it was clean about a week ago, then i decided to re-arrange my room. and now it looks like a giant shit hole. man this is fun.

had bundles of fun last night at ali's, it was a good time. i like being able to sit with a bunch of people that i'm comfortable with and just talking. well, i can't say a bunch of people i'm comfortable with because i just met that dave (or david or whatever his name is) kid a few hours before. and i dont really know chase that well, but i've known who he was since the seventh grade, so i guess i can say i was comfortable around him. but whatever, the point is that i had mucho fun just talking. we made plans for this summer and i am excited.

today was one of those randomn days where my mom wakes my up at 10 and tells me to take a super quick shower because she's taking me shopping. and hey, if she wants to spend money on me i'm not going to say no, so she took me shopping. college shopping, of course. she's on this huge college kick right now. it's kind of creepy. so i bought towels, a pair of shoes(they weren't a necessity but i have an addicion to shoes, i dont know where that came from), and then she got me a toaster oven (?), these shelf things and a pair of pants. my mom always tries to supprise me with something that she finds cute, so she'll buy it and then show it to me a few hours later. she got me some earrings, and they are sort of pretty, i like them. i think this is the first time one of her "surprises" was something that i liked.

a letter to my love

Sat, 02 Jul 2005 02:31:08 GMT

ok, so here's the plan. tomorrow im going to a wedding, with kyle. my mom and i had an argument over it today. she wanted to see what i was wearing, so i showed her what i decided to wear. but that wasn't good enough for her. she yelled at me. so i go to the mall to try and find something to wear, basically something to please mommy. emily came with me. i got this shitty ass dress that i look like a cheap whore in, it was only 17 bucks. so it was pretty cheap. emily said that mom would like it, but i hate it on me. and then i got this sort of dressy shirt, and i have a skirt at home that would match it. so i come home, and i show mom the shirt and the skirt i plan to wear with it, and she goes off on me again. i show her the dress and she loves it. yea!

so what i just wrote up there was basically pointless, but it fill you in, if you even bother with reading the crap.

i've devised a plan. i have a purse that i can fit the skirt in along with all my other stuff. then when kyle gets here to pick me up, he's going to put my shirt in his pocket. then we'll go to the truck, and head for martha's exchange for the wedding. on the way i will hop into the back seat, and thanks to the tinted windows in the new truck, i will be able to change with nobody watching me. it's perfect! so kyle, read this..and you'll know what you're doing for me tomorrow. thanks!

i feel bad. i talked to hilly on monday. we planned to go bowling tonight, i was supposed to call her on wednesday about it. every time i called her there was no answer. i couldnt call her yesterdya cuz she was working, and i tried calling her today, but all i got was the machine. so we didnt get to go bowling. i feel horrible. i promised we would go tonight, and she always takes this kind of stuff to heart. and it really bothers her when i say we're going to do something, and then it doesn't happen. i've been a bad girl again. and she'll say something to me about it and start crying, and then i'll start crying cuz i messed up. shame on me

Fri, 01 Jul 2005 14:07:21 GMT

yesterday i was helping my sister jenny. she had to drop her car off at toyota, and she had to take cora and jack with her. but then they had no way to get home, so i followed then to toyota, then i was going to take them all home. jenny had to wait in line, so while she was waiting i moved the kids car seats into my car, and i needed gas, so i was going to go and do that. she asked me if i could take the kids just so they wouldnt get bored out of their minds. so i said yes, and i took them. i went to a full service thingy because i would have been scared to leave them alone and go and pay. i was afraid of something happening, so thats why i went for the full service. so the guy is filling my tank, and i notice that he's looking at cora and jack, who are happily sitting in their car seats. it's because of men like this one i decided to go for the full service. then he looks at me when he's all done and says, "wow, im amazed. you look so young to be a mom, but they look happy. you must be doing a good job." i didnt know what to say. i just looked and said "they aren't mine." then drove away.

i got my classes for next year yesterday. im all excited, and happy. they're good classes. even though i only got to choose 2 out of the 11, i got then. so i am happy. im gonna get to play with saws in one of my classes, someone is going to lose an arm(!!).

kyle told me what he got me for my birthday yesterday. i know you're not supposed to know ahead of time, but i wont be here for it anyways. so it's an early gift... and he's taking me to see blue men! THREE BLUE MEN! yes, then blue man group people on august 12. im uber excited!

EAT MY SOCKS!

Thu, 30 Jun 2005 00:26:08 GMT

im getting bored with myself, i dont like this very much... anyways,

i was thinking today. about my zine. i looked through it earlier. i ahve fifty copies that are going to have nothing done to them. a waste of fifty copies, it's excellent. but while i was looking at it, i realized that i really put no effort into it, none at all. it's basically a pile of shit.
so im going to make another one. and this one is going to have visible effort in it. lots of it too. and im going to make plenty of copies and then go to boston and leave it at tower records. and ill be famous. hah, yea. famous. thats a joke.

little roooooobb

Tue, 28 Jun 2005 22:23:53 GMT

last night i watched gothica for the first time. i was hoping that hally berry woudl get killed, so i was let down.

today i wateched uptown girls, it was an alright movie. i cried, but i liked it.

a few days ago i watched the cat in the hat movie. i havent watched that since it came out on video. i was angered by the scene where they go underground and there's the whole club thing, and cat stands there watching paris hilton dance. i never noticed that that was paris hilton. i wanted to remove her from the movie.

Mon, 27 Jun 2005 20:26:00 GMT

mmmassive headache...it feels good.

job hunting is prooving to be unsucessful. nobody wants to hire me. it sucks. i need money. lots. i need it to find a gift for kyle. a birthday gift. a good one. and i have a few days less this year than usual. not that i ever give him a gift on time. so its like i no longer have the normal extra week. and i have to get it early. so essentially it's double early. not good.

i'm tired of having deli turkey meat here. every time im looking in the fridge my mom says we have turkey! i had turkey for like 6 days in a row. dont want that anymore!

Sun, 26 Jun 2005 06:22:33 GMT

MMMMMMBLLLAAKYLEFUCKINGJ!

your so easy

Sat, 25 Jun 2005 13:44:13 GMT

i just got up about 5 minutes ago, thats late for me, oh well. im excited about it getting hot out, i want to go to the beach.
the whole ghetto prom thing wasnt that bad. truthfully, i didnt think i would like it that much, but it was pretty fun. i lost both my water guns, but only one of them really counts, because the other was broken in the first place. so i should say i lost a water gun. is water gun one word or two? watergun or water gun?

i dont really know what to say. not really sure what im doing today, im hoping time to clay will call that way i'll have a job. then theres two parties tonight that i was invited to. id feel bad not going to one of them, so ill go to both i guess. i feel special being wanted at two different places at the same time.